I finished reading Extreme Ownership by Jocko Willink and Leif Babin. I couldn’t have read a better book during the time I’m reevaluating my discipline. At my current duty station at Camp Lejeune, I found myself in a work environment of complacent and plateauing on all levels of myself. The Marine Corps wants individuals to focus on developing our small unit leadership, whole Marine Concept and Improving ourselves. Majority of leaders are focused on retiring or thinking of the next billet to be assigned. The culture of the command was due to the strong junior Marine population being bogged down with inexperienced Non-Commissioned Officers who were still developing.
In 2021, I hit the ground running ensuring I did my military education for Sergeant, became a Martial Arts Instructor, attending college to receive my degree.
In June 2022, before attending the Martial Arts Center of Excellence, I did not feel right or ready to attend. I felt undisciplined and felt emotional. Which leads me to believe that I was the problem.
I wasn’t effectively leading but more of managing personnel. I wasn’t disciplined in my schedule and made time to properly fuel my body, waking up on time (anywhere between 4:30am- 7:00am). I was sporadic and my daily to do list was when I felt like it. Because everyday was the same.
At this point of my life and career, I have to utilize chapter one-Extreme Ownership, chapter nine-Plan, and chapter 12-Discipline Equals Freedom – The Dichotomy of Leadership. I have to accept responsibility for the things I believe that are lacking. For the overthinking I am doing and not taking action to combat it. My personal fitness and daily intake of nutrition for my lack of planning and execution which led me to a performance shortfall with the increasing demand of others. The Dichotomy of leadership in finding balance of being great between many responsibilities.
I reflect on the past and remember the glory days. Even with my own training that made me feel like I was failing. I remembered seeing a lot of results compared to now. But then, I wasn’t responsible for 40 Marines and a 15 year old sister. I was responsible for myself but circumstances have changed. While I excelled then, I was not excelling now. I can’t go back and be the person I was then. I can’t reproduce results but I can reproduce habits. I was waking up early and having planned out workouts with Sergeant Long (Currently Staff Sergeant Long). We had consistent workouts that developed well rounded fitness in our Marines and we never worried about Marines obtaining a second class Physical Fitness Test (PFT) or Combat Fitness Test (CFT). I trained mentally, physically and spiritually. I attended church and ran with a pack. Neither of those I do anymore. What changed? I had to redefine success with no longer going to MARSOC when adopting my sister and that wasn’t a priority anymore. I was taking discipline and placing my emotions to the side. I wanted to be logical in my thinking rather than feeling everything and everyone around me. I wanted my foundation to be solid when I say I’m going to do something. In which I needed to be responsible in looking and planning my week.
I reviewed the chapters and thought about my own life that I struggled with. I struggled with not having control with anything I was doing. I didn’t have time segments and ran around the schedule of who needed me depending on the day. Which makes me sporadic. I’ll focus on a weekly planner to help me have somewhat of a plan of action. Planning my day with the Staff Non-Commissioned Officers and their responsibilities.
My personal fitness, I needed to run more. My shins are killing me and frankly, I’m scared to run. I’m frightened to run at the faster pace I am used to. If I told the Marines this, they wouldn’t believe me. I ran two half-marathons within a three month span on a whim. I did that for enjoyment. I needed to run because of performance. The performance will help with my confidence and balance.
The Dichotomy of leadership is all about balance. It reminds me of the philosopher Aristotle who prided himself on balance. Jocko reinforced Aristotle’s claim many years ago. I find myself looking inside and asking what type of leader is required from me at my current billet. Is this mission getting done? What needs to be improved upon and who is in the wrong place? What solutions are needed for the problems you can’t even identify? Does the below fit into who I am and what I’m representing? Or am I playing leader and being a detriment to those around me?
“The Dichotomy of Leadership A good leader must be:
• confident but not cocky; courageous but not foolhardy;
• competitive but a gracious loser;
• attentive to details but not obsessed by them;
• strong but have endurance;
• a leader and follower;
• humble not passive;
• aggressive not overbearing;
• quiet not silent;
• calm but not robotic, logical but not devoid of emotions;
• close with the troops but not so close that one becomes more important than another or more important than the good of the team; not so close that they forget who is in charge.
• able to execute Extreme Ownership, while exercising Decentralized Command.
A good leader has nothing to prove, but everything to prove.“
Reading Extreme Ownership reinforced shortfalls that needed improvement in my life. I recommend this book that needs to take responsibility in their life and lead once again. Coming from someone that was responsible, and no longer feels responsibility for his own life. I’m going after it again. A little wiser and experiencing failure that I don’t want to experience again.
References:
Willink, J., & Babin, L. (2018). Chapter 12. In Extreme ownership: How U.S. navy seals lead and win (pp. 277–278). essay, Macmillan.
Wildland Fire Leadership Principles. (2017). Why Read Extreme Ownership? https://www.nwcg.gov/sites/default/files/wfldp/toolbox/prp/extreme-ownership.pdf
Inspired Knight 