I don’t know what happened between the spilt. My mom’s relationship with her long term boyfriend. We stayed under his house in Crystal River and some of our clothes were thrown out. I don’t remember but I knew mom was upset. I’ve seen her rampant emotions come alive. I’ve blocked out a lot of it, just like everything else. Trying to be strong like my brothers because they were men in my eyes.
I was pulled out of my fourth grade class, I didn’t care for the teacher but I was going to miss my classmates. I still miss those kids today.
It wasn’t a good outcome and I didn’t have much to take with me when we went to Columbia Missouri.
I was enjoying the car ride while my mom was distraught and experiencing loss. I watched the midnight moon and glowing lights we pass. Repetitive lights and cities, they looked the same in my youthful eyes.
In some state, a state trooper pulled us over. We left in such a hurry and filled with a lot of hate. We didn’t take a baby seat for our little Alexis. Mom pleaded, cried and she only had so much money. The state trooper doing what he was born to do and enforcing the rightful law.
“I’ll follow you to the next store that is available” he said.
And she drove to Walmart and I was carrying Alexis and the sight i couldn’t tuck away, hide or forget.
The way she cried in front of others. Not tears streaming down her beautiful face. She wailed, couldn’t breathe, and was broken. And everyone knew that she was experiencing a heartache and unknown future.
I’ll never forget the people that walked on by.
I’ve always heard that I couldn’t get rid of the kindness in my heart because I would always bear this in my mind. To never allow someone in my vicinity to be at their lowest and not help them up.
The cashier watched as she scanned the item and watched her cry and tell her the cost.
We got the baby seat and continued on.
We got closer to our destination and we drove in the colder month and it was dark.
//
“Look outside Hercules” Madre said gently not trying to wake Alexis up. I see white sand coming from the sky. The orange street lights hiding the snow. The first experience of seeing snowfall.
//
Madre worked at a gas station. Maybe to figure out what is next. She befriended a coworker and we were roommates.
She was such a talker. Sweet kind in every way. She helped her find a partner and she left. We had a empty apartment and I guess we didn’t have electric to heat our home.
She made a makeshift bed and my older brother slept on the couch the girl left.
Our backs were against one another and I felt her warmth. I was such a kid, I hoped I kept her warm. I remembered during that time that it was just another early morning of me jumping in bed to watch a couple of cartoons. She would ask if I wanted breakfast and I told her I already had cereal just so we could spend time together. It was a cold night but I was loved. I knew that then.
A year goes by, and I’m back in Florida. Enrolled in fifth grade and missed being a safety patrol. I didn’t know what to expect but I was nervous that I was different. That I skipped a beat and maybe missed out.
Until I was walking the hall and a blonde hair and blue eye boy named Jake Omelian.
“Hey! You’re back!”
I don’t remember what was said after but I remember that it made me happy. It makes me happy now thinking about it now.
Inspired Knight 