I watched him laughing with those that surrounded his desk. With his glint in his eyes and the gleam of his smile. He was someone to be around. But do you see me?
Are you focused or are you biding your time and hoping things will happen? You’re the best of the worst in this case. Don’t you remember you are that thing that happens itself in the world? That if you want change, you have to do something about it.
They will laugh with you, but they won’t run with you. They won’t challenge you. They weren’t laying there with you to reassure you and reaffirm you on your goals. They muddle themselves with problems and you’ve gotten yourself into it too. You were above that, now you’re intertwined with the webs you’ve avoided. And you’re laughing?
So, do you see me? Are you listening? Or are you forgetting?
The streak you seek is on the other side of discipline. On the other side of your feelings and the problems. If you want the streak, be consistent and fine tune it. You’re all over the place and sporadic, and that is why you have sporadic results.
I want you to imagine this. August 27th, 2022. You sit down in at Jacksonville High School’s classroom. You have your calculator you know how to use, six pencils, peanut butter crackers and your registration to take the SAT. You’re almost 25 years old in a classroom of 16 year olds. You think you’re eight years too late, but I think you’re right on time. You’ve prepared and matured. All you need is 1000. Could you imagine if you were higher? How much work are you willing to do and how much are you willing to sacrifice? Is laughing with people who won’t be a part of your long life worth it? Is it worth it for you? Your future family depends on it.
On August 29th, 2022, you start your class in which you’ve previously got dropped for. Imagine getting 280 and above in the Combat Fitness Test and Physical Fitness Test. Something they told you before was a performance shortfall. And in October you receive your red tab and become a Martial Arts Instructor Trainer. It will take you to the next level, a level where people shouldn’t be coming to you laughing with you. Those who laugh with you need to understand similar suffering. A shared bond. You shouldn’t be laughing with them, because they’re not on the same level as you.
I was having a good time talking about our generic conversations we had. They had good jokes and it’s nice to think that people like to come around me to have a good time. I was laughing when I had a realization. That none of them didn’t care. That my pain was for me to deal with and their pain was for them to deal with. I’ve seen it in their subtle ways of looking after one another. The little bickering and little disrespect they had for one another. To bide their time until something better comes along and how forgotten I become.
Inspired Knight 